If you are a “normal person” in a “normal relationship”, then you may have relationship problems from time to time. Those of you who have no relationship problems are just a little abnormal. We all know from experience, that problems will come up in relationships. If you are married, you know this. If you have kids, you know this. If you work with at least one person other than yourself, you know this. It comes with the territory of being in a relationship. Though sometimes it seems relationship problems happen more often than not.
A relationship rut
We’ve gone through that in our marriage as well as in our parenting. Ever so often we hit one of those seasons, and we are like, “What is going on!”. We can’t seem to agree, we seem like we are always on a different page, and it just seems like we are sitting on stools in opposite corners of a ring. Can you relate?
Of course you can relate, because you are normal, and you have a normal relationship. But, why does this happen? Why do we get in these relationship ruts. I mean, if you know why you get in these ruts, then you should be able to avoid them, or at least make it so it doesn’t last as long.
The solution to our relationship problems
My wife and I have noticed one thing that contributes to our relationship ruts, or seasons of constant relationship problems. But the problem is, we usually take notice after it has dragged on way longer that we hoped. Once we realize this and get back to this one thing, the tables seem to turn. Do we still have relationship problems after realizing this? Yes, we do. But even when we do, they don’t seem to linger, or feel like it is our constant state. And when we do experience problems we are better able to handle them.
“It’s not the problem, but how you handle the problem.” – unknown
So, what is this one thing? The beauty about this one thing is that everyone can have it. In fact, you probably have done it before, but got lax just like we did. This one thing is prayer.
The solution is so simple
When prayer is lacking or inconsistent in our lives, relationship problems typically are just the opposite. That aren’t lacking, but bountiful. They are even consistent it seems.
Prayer is the one thing that helps us best deal with all problems we face. And praying with your spouse not only helps us deal with it, but it brings a level of oneness in our relationship that we don’t get from anything else. I encourage you to make prayer a regular practice in your life. Pray alone, pray with your spouse, and pray with your kids.
If prayer is not received or “acceptable” in your place of employment, it doesn’t have to stop you from using the power and privilege of prayer in regards to your work. Pray for your employer, pray for your team or co-workers. Pray for the kids you teach at school. Pray for your kid’s friends, teachers, and classmates.
When you do, be sure to observe how your relationships change. And the best part is that it is a change that starts with you.
Michael Johnson says
Great post, Jackie! SPOT ON! Will be sharing this post with the Future Marriage University (FMU) community at https://www.facebook.com/FMUniversity.
And I’d love your thoughts on the connection between prayer and relational wellness from our FMU Date Night Advice (DNA) blog: http://f-m-u.com/Blog/how-to-keep-from-growing-apart/.
Great post, Jackie. I’m with you on prayer. Without God in my marriage, well we wouldn’t be where we are at today. thankful.
Steve Austin says
Fantastic post. Seems so simple, yet I know in my own life, it is one of the easiest things (sadly) to overlook. I become so busy with life, parenting, and MINISTRY, that we forget to pray together. Thanks for this reminder!
Trivedi Effect says
Good one, Try to understand your actions and your intentions. Keeping a journal can help.