This weekend I witnessed firsthand what happens when you invest more and give everything you have into your most important relationship. Even when circumstances place you on opposing sides, it is very very difficult to break that bond.
I live in Indianapolis, and this weekend one of the biggest events happened here since the Super Bowl was hosted in Indy. Peyton Manning, now of the Denver Broncos, returned to Indy to play the team and city he once invested so much into, and they into him. The local media shared their thoughts throughout the weekend on the “love affair that the city of Indianapolis had with Peyton Manning.”
What happens when you invest more in your relationship
For 13 years the Indiananpolis Colts and city invested into their relationship with Peyton. And Peyton invested just as much into this city. Peyton loved Indy and Indy loved Peyton. An although Peyton was returning to do his best to beat the Colts, and the Colts were trying to beat him, there was no love lost. Fans didn’t even seem to know who to root for.
Fans throughout the city wore Colts and Broncos Peyton Manning jerseys. The Colts did a tribute to all Peyton had done for the team and city, which seemed to have Peyton close to tears on the field prior to the game starting. It was deep, very deep. At one point while me and my family watched the game I said “we are winning,” my son looked at me with a confused look. Like that didn’t provide any clarity because we loved both Peyton’s old team and his new team.
We can have an unbreakable bond like that
What I learned from witnessing it all was putting so much time, resources, and emotion into a relationship creates a bond that can withstand anything. It can even withstand times when you are supposed to be against each other. If that can happen in the relationship between a city and a professional athlete, think about the bond it can create between you and your spouse, or you and your kids.
I encourage you to take your most important relationships deeper. Invest more in your relationships. Invest more time. Invest more resources. Get emotionally vested in your relationships.
Below are 3 practical ways you can do so with your spouse and 3 practical ways you can do so with your kids.
How to create an unbreakable bond with your spouse:
- Date regularly. My wife and I try to have a weekly date night. We haven’t done so as consistently as we have wanted to, but we have at least done so monthly this entire year. The more frequently we date the closer our relationship seems to be.
- Work at shared goals/activities. My wife and I ran a 5k together and recently committed to exercising together. Both have been challenging. But we’ve sweated, sacrificed and pushed one another through. When we are done we both have an appreciation of each other and a sense of accomplishment.
- Serve together. Once per month my wife and I serve in our children’s pre-k ministry at our church. Once per week we serve in the Awana club our kids participate in. Spending that time together while serving others gives us something else in common to grow our bond.
How to create an unbreakable bond with your kids:
- Eat meals together. Having meals with your kids is a great time to talk and listen. There is something about sharing a meal that breaks down walls of communication and road blocks in a relationship. Sharing at least one meal per day together is something achievable for almost every family.
- Regular bedtime routine. Our kids have become accustomed to our bedtime routine. The routine consists of praying with each kid or praying together as a family before each kid gets into their bed. We will pray, let them pray, and then have a brief talk. Sometimes the routine takes a minute or two. Sometimes it takes 10-15 minutes and sometimes it takes 20-30. No matter how long it takes, it grows our bond.
- Do something outside of the house together. We homeschool our kids and once per week we meet with several other homeschooling families for a community day of school. On this day our entire family gets up early to drive to the church where we meet. It is a true family affair. We also coach their sports teams, teach their Awana and classes at church. Some of those times are one on one and others are with a group. Either way, it provides us another way to go deeper in our relationship with the time spent.
How can your relationship stand through circumstances that place you on opposing sides?
photo credit: awsandlight via photopin cc
Some great tips here Jackie, thanks a lot. We are working on some shared goals this year.
Great post, Jackie! Thanks for this.
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