parenting

This past weekend my wife and some of the other wives/moms who are in our circle of friends had their Moms’ Night Out. They typically do this 2-3 times per year, and it always seems to come at just the right time for my wife. Right when she is at or near the point of burnout.

I am thankful for the relationships she has developed with this group of ladies, and love how they pour into each other when and where they need it most. However, on the other end of the spectrum, while the ladies are hanging out, being renewed and refreshed, it can be a different story for the dads.

What does a moms’ night out mean for dads?

Moms’ Night Out means dads’ night in with kids. As much as we think we have it together, we always learn that our wives, the mothers of our children, run a more efficient “ship” than we do. With me at the helm we usually end up late to where we need to go. We usually end up eating way too late, or eating stuff we shouldn’t. And sometimes one of the kids leaves the house without something vital, like their emergency medicine/EpiPen.

What I am trying to say is us dads could use some help during moms’ night out/dads’ night in with the kids. So, fellas I am here to help, with some assistance from some moms of course.

Below are the top 12 do’s and top 12 don’ts for dads during moms’ night out. Courtesy of the movie, Moms’ Night Out. Enjoy and be sure to follow each tip! 🙂

A dad’s top 12 do’s and don’ts during moms’ night out.

1. Do count the number of you kids you have at the start of the evening. Don’t have fewer kids than you started with at the end of the evening.
2. Do teach your kids how they can help you around the yard/house. Don’t teach them how to use the chainsaw for pruning.
3. Don’t call your wife…no matter how tough it gets. Do call your wife if you end up in the Emergency Room.
4. Do let them pick their favorite restaurant for supper with you. Don’t let them pick the Pizza Playland without backup…lots of backup!
5. Do invite another dad and his kids to share the evening with your family. Don’t allow that dad to sneak away and leave you with all the kids.
6. Do let them have a cookie after supper. Don’t let them eat chocolate cake for supper.
7. Do wrestle with your kids and roll on the ground. Don’t try this immediately after meals.
8. Do let them color a pretty picture for mommy. Don’t let them color it on the living room wall.
9. Do ignore your emails. Don’t ignore the noises coming from the baby monitor.
10. Do let your kids stay up later than they normally get to. Don’t head off to bed before your kids do. (This would be me.)
11. Do read your kids a calming bedtime story. Don’t let them watch Frankenstein before bedtime.
12. Do say a thankful bedtime prayer with your kids. Don’t hide in the closet praying for your wife to come home early!

Hopefully this will help you to have a successful dads’ night in with the kids so your wife won’t be scared to have moms’ night out with her girlfriends.

What is your top tip for having a successful night in with the kids?

This past weekend there was an uproar about a private conversation between an NBA team owner, Donald Sterling, and his “girlfriend.” It has been a hot topic. Mr. Sterling revealed some of his deep rooted beliefs related to the society we live in, and how he feels about other races.

The comments were very racially insensitive and very offensive to many people of all races. There is a ton that could be said about that, but instead of going on a rant about his comments, I want use to that private conversation to look at our relationships deeper.

The conversation that was revealed was a conversation which Mr. Sterling never would have imagined would be shared for the world to hear. Had he known that I’m certain what he said would be different. But since he thought it was private he revealed his true feelings and beliefs.

What if the private conversations in your relationship were shared with the world?

Just imagine that. Imagine the conversations you have behind closed doors with those closest to you. Conversations with your spouse and with your kids.

What would those conversations reveal about you as a spouse or as a parent?

As someone who writes to help others better lead and love those who matter most, I often think about this. If some of my private conversations with my wife or kids were recorded and shared with the world, you may not read my writing.

I would be ashamed of some of my private conversations

To be honest, sometimes I’m just plain embarrassed about what I say and the things I do. This has nothing to do with Donald Sterling, nor does it have to do with race. In private we are who we are. There is no face, no act, no playing politics. And sometimes those private conversations reveal our flaws.

I want that private, true me, to be something I’m proud of if anyone else got a glimpse of it. I want it to be known that I love my wife like Christ loved the church. I want it to be known that I don’t provoke my children to anger, but I bring them up with discipline and instruction from the Lord.

Would you be ashamed of your private conversations?

So in light of the Donald Sterling topic, is your private life, private conversations, and relationships behind closed doors something you’d be proud of if other people heard them? Or would they bring embarrassment, and shame to you and your family?

If the latter is true, then it’s time to make some changes. The bible teaches that none of us are perfect, but perhaps thinking from a different perspective can help us better live a life that we’d be proud of publicly and privately.

Have you ever done or said something to your spouse or kids that you wish you could take back? Please share in the comment section below.