I don’t know everything. I don’t even know close to everything. The moment that I embraced this truth is the moment that I felt I could truly begin learning. So, how do I learn? Yes, I learn from reading books, but the most useful activity that I have learned from in my lifetime is honest and open conversation with mentors. My mentors are those individuals which I look up to and know that they have been through a lot of life already. They have probably encountered the same situations that I am going through in the present moment and they have also done life well. Those are the people I want to learn from. And if I am introduced to ideas that challenge me and I want to know more, the internet has made it easy to find great idea makers and connect us quickly through email and a phone call.
Why do I subscribe to seeking out inspiration from these people that I look up to?
Life is all about learning from those who know more.
I have my strengths, but I also have my weaknesses. Through understanding what these are, I have learned to surround myself with people who make me better in almost every area of life. These are the people that I call, mentors.
You see, people like to compartmentalize life and be great in one area and be terrible at another and are ok with that . For me, I don’t subscribe to the mentality that being great at your career, but doing family life terribly is ok. I used to be that guy, but I am not ok with that anymore. I used to be ok with working endless hours, but now I am not ok with that. I used to be the guy that was ok with not speaking to my wife and keeping to myself, but now I am not ok with that. I used to be the guy that was relentless in seeking out my happiness in material things until I found it left this gaping void in life, but I am not ok with that anymore, either. Why?
Because the closest people to us need all of us, not a fraction of our lives.
The people around you need the best you there can possibly be. So, where do mentors fit into making you better? I believe that people can help develop you in different areas, even where you are lacking. I also believe that people can increase their capacity as people pour into their lives and help them along in their journey. For me, a face-to-face mentoring relationship works best, so I have found this in people close to me that inspire me to be a better me. I also make a few phone calls to out-of-town mentors who can inspire me over the telephone. But, maybe it is an online mastermind group that would work best for you. Or maybe it is the face-to-face relationships that work best for you as well. Whatever the case may be, begin surrounding yourself with people who make you better and begin living life better than you are right now.
How do you find the best mentors for you and information that challenges you?
I found that asking one simple question to people that I looked up to began steering me in the right direction. This doesn’t mean to neglect important relationships in your life, but it does mean to soak up the most valuable information that you can from those individuals that you want to learn from. So, do you want to know what that one question is that I ask as often as I can?…
The question is,
“Who inspires you?”
That’s it. Once I began asking the people that I admired most who their mentors were, I found myself learning more valuable insight, their interpretation of these life enhancements and information that I never could have imagined on my own. And I was able to learn from the source of this wealth of information.
So, when you find your selected mentors, keep asking this one valuable question. That is the one question that will change your life. That is the one question that will improve how you do life. That is the one question that will increase your capacity for learning.
Begin with asking the right question.
Hi Adam. Love the new picture. I am never more in awe of creation than when I am looking at a sky full of stars.
This one was a little hard for me to read, as, honestly, I am going through a period of loneliness in my life. Lonely for someone inspiring. I live in a small town and made the mistake of not nurturing my friendships while I was in school for seven years and recovering from major medical stuff…but…just two weeks ago I determined to do something about that, and I will begin attending a new group in January.
For many years I had a wonderful elderly woman who mentored me here. She and her husband were very wise. Picture this…a 90+ year old man sitting in his den wearing his wool vest with the gold pocket watch hanging from a chain through his button-hole listening to classical music and reading the Bible and philosophy and history books before a crackling fire. That was Herb…a retired international charitable giving attorney. Margaret came along side me after I broke my neck in May of 2000 and mentored me until the day I died…a wonderful gift for this gal who lost her parents very early in life.
Now I have many online friends, including you Adam, who I go to for mentoring. It does actually work! I am so thankful I live in this era of instant communication with other like-minded folks.
I am trusting though, that I will be one of those who mentors others. I am deliberate about it, especially when it comes to my adult children and grandchildren. How do I want to impact them while I am on this earth.
Great post, Adam.
See above….I meant that Margaret mentored me until the day SHE died…LOL. Sorry about that.
🙂 No problem. I figured it out.
Arent the stars a beautiful thing that God did? He is the most creative and inspirational mentor I can think of.
When you tell me that you have been experiencing loneliness lately, I can’t help but think about life’s seasons and that sometimes things are brought into our lives to help shape us. I have had these times in my life as well and I look back and see those times in life as teaching tools- ones that taught me to stand firm in what I believe on my own, because ultimately that’s what it comes down to. In the end we as individuals have to be strong. For me it was necessary. Knowing your story, you probably don’t need that. I know you have been through some things in your life that were difficult, but those kinds of times taught me to be inspired by God and what He had for me in those times. I hope that makes sense- that God uses these times to form us. There is no wasted time with God.
Anyways, It sounds like I would like Herb. I love learning from those that have done a lot of life and has had time to learn from it.
You are a mentor for me, Linda. You have taught me to push through obstacles, so I guess I should thank you for that. Your life is inspirational. Be blessed and encouraged today, Linda.
Hi Adam,
I just saw your answer to my comment. Thanks so much for saying those words to me. You are right in that I have been through a lot, but guess what? God doesn’t give me a pass on character building lessons! LOL. I think you are right…loneliness brings me back to seeking Him more. I’ve noticed over the years that when a life lesson is over, I get a reward for learning it…like a new friend! This has happened many times. Thanks for your thoughts…and you, my friend, and all of your writers, are mentors for so many. I appreciate all you do.
Adam, great article. I’m ALL for mentoring. I’d never had a mentor or even considered it until I took my job with Radical Mentoring and I am now a HUGE fan of the process. Finding someone older and wiser who has a lot more life experience under their belt can be an invaluable resource. Being able to learn from the mistakes of someone who has already been through the things I am currently going through is awesome. I love it. I am incredibly blessed and lucky to have a boss who is mentoring me and has a plethora of life experiences from which to mentor others. And inspire them along the way with the wisdom he’s gained over the years.
I can’t plug mentoring enough. Great post!
Finding and being a mentor is such a great experience when it is the right relationship. I love it when I find those relationships- when you find others who truly want to help others succeed.
Hi Adam, I just saw your blog on mentoring and honestly I feel like you stole my idea. Well, the idea I had was the same as yours. Had I put my idea into motion, it would’ve been exactly like the one you had. Congratulations, you beat me to it.
And, you even gave it a great name (mentoring). Like you, I always thought it was a shame that us as human beings learn so much and yet when we die, well, it all gets ‘lost’. So, kudos to you and it’s great to see somebody beat me to my idea and not only did a great job at it but made it better than I ever could have imagined. Keep up the good work.
Ha. Well, thank you, Maria. A mentoring relationship is one of the most valuable relationships that you can ever have.
I have found that plenty of people are looking for mentors but don’t know where to go or how to ask if one would enter into a mentor/mentee relationship. What are your thoughts on that.
Great question, Julia. For me, I have always sought it out, so I saw who was great in specific areas that I wanted to be good in and sought those people to mentor me. I have yet to be turned down, so I think it honors people where honor is due and they have a heart of serving others. Most of my life mentors have been found in church and business/writing mentors have been found online in the past. That’s just where I have personally found them and what works for me, but I do prefer face-to-face mentoring as that is what works best for me.