Focusing on a consistent basis can bring forth a happier and more productive life. Maybe you do not understand the importance of focus and giving something your complete attention in the moment. Maybe the habit of focus has not become part of your daily grind. I’m here to remind you that being mindful and present can have a tremendous effect on you.
Here are some techniques that will help you focus and enrich your decisions if you practice daily.
Wrong And Right Ways to Think
Assertive thinking is a common skill that you are already aware of and is powerful if used properly. Knowing how to focus daily gives you the power to change, and this focus creates a feeling. Of course, if you concentrate on how bad life is then you feel low. And if you focus on the good, it gives you energy and optimism.
When you concentrate on the downside you really feel the weight of life. If you realize how lucky you are to be living, to have a home, a job and really appreciate what you have, you will start to feel rich and grateful. Gratitude is one of those things you can get psyched about. When you’re down and you feel yourself spiraling out of control or circling from one bad thought to the next, you can shock yourself from the negative patterns by looking into what your going to gain from the experience and what you have.
“As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them.” – John F. Kennedy
How to Change Your Mindset
Your frame of mind and emotions should be controlled if you are going to improve the quality of your life. Sometimes by controlling your body you can control how you feel each day. Some actions and the way you move can create results that release the stress and change the physiology of our bodies. If you constantly stress about perfecting everything, your posture will reflect your stress. The best way to achieve results and get into a better frame of mind is by finding your flow where everything falls in place.
Think about a conversation you had where you were not your best and after it finished or later that day during reflection you thought, “That was an idiocy. What was I thinking?” Then there are times when you hit a point and you are on your game.
When you change the state of your mind, you raise the standard of your life. You already possess most skills that you need to accomplish a better mindset, but now you need to act on it. It is your frame of mind that causes a ripple effect in your life and also extends to other areas of your life.
How to Take Control of Your Focus
By getting in the right frame of mind you will build energy in your body and start clearing out the fear. Fear is a physical feeling and you can recognize it by changes in your physiology.
It is key to breathe, because not breathing causes stress. The feeling of anxiety stems from your system not receiving enough oxygen to function. When you don’t have enough oxygen, you will start to panic. By taking deliberate, deep, slow, consistent breaths, you can calm the body and feed the mind with oxygen.
Think assertively, be grateful, find your flow and breathe. You can start now by taking action and creating momentum by doing just one of these skills. One mindful minute is more productive than several mindless minutes.
Adam Smith says
Great post, Kirby. I think most people take breathing for granted. It really can do so much. I also like your points under “How to Change Your Mindset”. It lets the reader know that it’s a choice.
Kirby Ingles says
That’s awesome Adam, glad you liked the points on breathing and mindset. I use some power statements in my goal setting and one of them is “Change your Mindset, Change your Behavior.” I use breathing to control my energy, it takes practice but has done much more for my focus and physiology.
Erik Tyler says
Such an important topic, Kirby. And I concur with Adam — in a society that is ever more fast paced, people forget that they have control of (and responsibility for) something as simple as their own thoughts or breaths.
As technology advances, “developed” humans find ways to take multi-tasking and automaticity of results to increasingly higher levels. Pencil-and-paper math problems were replaced by simple touch calculators, which were replaced by smaller and more complex computers. Currently, I can just ask Siri to figure out my math. In most instances, automatic algorithms predict my needs and solve problems in the background without my ever realizing the math is happening at all.
The faces of our smart phones are arrayed with neat rows of a hundred apps, all with little red bubbles demanding that we must find out RIGHT NOW that our friend Sarah “loves peanut butter (!!!)” or that someone just recorded himself riding a unicycle across the rain gutter of some government building. And we have accepted, for the most part, that relieving ourselves of these red bubbles is acceptable at any time: while with family, out to dinner with a friend, on the john.
I learned this week that Amazon.com is working on a flying drone program that will get customers’ orders to their doors about a half hour after placing an order online. I commented to the friend who told me that, not long after this goes into effect, people will be standing by the door 31 minutes after ordering, irritated about their “late” delivery.
It’s not hard to see why more and more people struggle with stress and anxiety, or lack focus in general.
I’m all for technology and social media. I’m using it now as I write. There is great value in the information and connections available to us through them. But we are still responsible for our own humanity, character and control. Technology doesn’t make anyone stressed or impatient or rude. Those are – and always will be – a choice.
With that in mind, here are a few additional things that help me maintain (or regain) focus:
1. Limit email and social media checks. If you currently check 100 times a day (and this is about average), try cutting that to 50. Don’t estimate. Keeping track will cause you to be mindful. If it’s currently 50, cut it to 30. You will experience anxiety initially, because this is a real addiction. But if you can stick to plan, you will decrease its hold on you – and increase your overall mastery of focus in life.
2. Leave time for silence. Shut all electronics off. Silence your phone. Go for a walk or a drive – without headphones or the radio playing. We have lost the ability to tolerate silence. But silence is the catalyst for self-awareness, creativity and, ultimately, personal change. This too will be uncomfortable at first. But, like getting back to a physical exercise or gym routine, it hurts because it’s doing something good for your system.
3. Keep people at the center. Try turning your phone OFF when you are spending time with family or out to dinner with a friend. Leave it in another room or in the car. Remember what it is like to sustain eye contact with the person across from you. Let yourself clunk through the awkwardness of filling 45 minutes with real conversation, uninterrupted by checking texts or incoming social media messages.
All I can say is – I dare you.
Kirby Ingles says
Erik,
Definitely these 3 tips are part of my daily plan. I think the people and time for self-reflection through silence are the most important part of our lives. Thanks for the comment these are all interesting points and concerns. I hope to share more about mindfulness in the future posts. The last four weeks I’ve been researching mindfulness in the communication process, such an interesting topic. We can apply mindfulness in everything we do by staying in the present.
Jed Jurchenko says
“Gratitude is one of those things you can get psyched about.” Love that line!
Kirby Ingles says
Thanks Jed, The Art of Gratitude has really change my life. Not by just being thankful for what I have but asking myself”
Why it happened.
What it means to me.
How I can replicate it.
How did others contribute.
Important questions to ask yourself.
Glenn Brooke says
Many of us suspect that the “muchness, manyness, and noise” is becoming a substitute for actual thinking. Good counsel here, Kirby, thanks.
Kirby Ingles says
Thanks Glenn. Noise is all around us. We have to use our filters better.