We are in the midst of a major identity crisis. We live in a world where it is cool to share every moment, however we often share these moments without actually thinking about it. Recently, I’ve had the opportunity to begin a process of an inward search regarding my childhood and how I am currently affected by past circumstances. It is a tough process that you wouldn’t want to share on social media, let alone think of. Social media has created our “currency” of self-worth. We now measure our worth in life compared to how much “social currency” we have or the amount of likes we got on our last photo. Throughout my journey online I am discovering the content that impacts people the most doesn’t get the most shares, but the most clicks.
A few months ago I posted on masterbation and it wasn’t shared a hundred times, but everytime I posted it, this article got more clicks than I had ever seen before. We love to share the things that make us look good, but the crummy parts of our lives that need help we only view in private. I wonder if more of us were honest on social media would we become better human beings inwardly? We absolutely love the “triumph” stories of those who rose from nothing and had challenges in the middle, but we rarely like to tell of our own challenges.
Matt Knisely wrote a book called Framing Faith that begs us to take a step back from the distraction of life and be present. Instead of being present, we try to capture the moment and share it with the world without enjoying the moment. I’ve been there and I am still there in some cases but I am learning that my value and identity isn’t related to my social currency. Social currency is great but we have to be careful that it doesn’t become “king”.
The result of these many self-projectons can end up relegating our view of composition to interest instead of the whole picture if we let it. Rather than taking the time to get to know the real us–the unique creatures God made us to be–the temptation is to fill our time with real-time tweeting, liking, pinning, posting and Instagramming and then measuring all the feedback to shape who we should become. – Matt Knisely Framing Faith
The measurement of our identity shouldn’t be in how others view our virtual relationships, but how those we are actually in relationship view us. To take the people that know us personally for granted is a mistake on our parts. Our identity and inward beings are shaped by the people we spend the most time with. In our day and age we are spending more time on our devices than with people. I could give you a checklist of items on how to build valuable relationships, but it wouldn’t work. Relationships are only forged properly with honesty and transparency.
Often our honesty and transparency is wounding, evil and hurtful but that’s a huge part of what makes our relationships. The ability to see someone’s flaws and love them inspite of them. Instead of running from those inward flaws address them and overcome them. We all have a story of triumph within us that is worth fighting for that will help us understand ourselves more and forge better relationships.
Relationships aren’t measured by likes, followers and repins. Relationships are measured by give, take and sticking it out to see the glory of unbreakable relationships that are just what we need in each season of our lives.