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self improvement

how to give an apology - bashful man

Erik Tyler | October 22, 2015 | 4 Comments

How to Give an Apology (and Mean It)

Today’s COMMUNICATION Post – by Erik Tyler

A Check-up

I want to start by asking you to literally stop right now, reflect, and answer this question honestly:

When is the last time you gave a heartfelt apology?

Don’t count times you gave an apology because you wanted something in return, or because you wanted to avoid negative fallout.  Pinpoint in your mind the last time you truly felt you had wronged someone.

You intentionally hurt someone.

You ran roughshod over them to assert yourself when things didn’t go your way.

You were rude or harsh with someone, or you took your frustration out on them when they were not to blame.

You did what was best for you, without considering how someone else felt or how your actions would affect them.

You talked negatively about someone, causing others to ridicule or mistrust them.

And you knew it.  You knew you were in the wrong.  But at some point afterward, you experienced real remorse. You just felt lousy about it – so much so that you went back and offered a sincere apology without a single excuse.

When was the last time? To whom did you apologize?  Was it a family member? A friend?  A co-worker or boss?  A student? A server at a restaurant?  A customer care or tech support person you were on the phone with?

If it was so long ago that the details are foggy – or if you can’t remember a specific time at all – ask yourself, What does that say about me? As far as I can see, there are only two things it could mean:

1. You are an anomaly. You are close to perfect and never blow it with other people, and therefore don’t really ever have the need to apologize. 

2. You aren’t apologizing enough.

[Read more…] about How to Give an Apology (and Mean It)

communication style experiment - test tubes

Erik Tyler | October 1, 2015 | 4 Comments

Communication Style: A Feedback Experiment

Today’s COMMUNICATION post – by Erik Tyler

I’d like to start with a question. But before I pose that question, I want to encourage you to actually answer it. From the very beginning here on asmithblog.com, I’ve been championing the importance of experimentation in the learning process. In short, those who are willing to engage and take risks will remember and grow. Those who feel that experimental learning is beneath them, or that it is a waste of time – well, they won’t remember or grow, at least not nearly to the degree as those who are willing to be participants in the process.

And now for that question:

How would you describe
your communication style
in three words or less?

How would you describe your communication style in three words or less? Click To Tweet

Grab a piece of paper, a sticky note or your Notes app right now and jot down 1 – 3 separate words that you feel best describe your own communication style. As you assess yourself, determine to be neither unduly flattering nor modest. Being honest about both your strengths and weaknesses is essential to maximizing your potential.

[Read more…] about Communication Style: A Feedback Experiment

personal brand - health man exercising lunges

Erik Tyler | September 24, 2015 | 4 Comments

Maximizing Your Personal Brand Part 4: Health

Today’s COMMUNICATION post – by Erik Tyler

This is the fourth and final installment (at least for now) in the series “Maximizing Your Personal Brand.” I trust that you have benefited from the previous posts in the series, and that if you have not yet read all of them, you’ll find some time to do so. It will complete the picture where personal brand is concerned. Here are those links, for your convenience:

Maximizing Your Personal Brand Part 1: Attire

Maximizing Your Personal Brand Part 2: Hair

Maximizing Your Personal Brand Part 3: Hygiene

Don’t skip over those too quickly. While the topics may sound simple, there is something for everyone in each of them (even those who are proudly sporting a bald head or who consider yourself squeaky clean).

In the event that you’re pressed for time, but have missed previous posts, let me quickly summarize one last time two key foundational concepts where personal brand is concerned:

  1. Nonverbal communication extends beyond expressions and gestures.

The first impressions that you make happen before you even get a chance to speak; yet those impressions will often dictate how – or even if – people will receive your message.

First impressions can dictate how – or even IF – people will receive your message. Click To Tweet
  1. You are your own personal brand.

This means devoting adequate time and resources to making sure that your identity remains unique, positive and memorable.

Make sure your personal brand remains unique, positive and memorable. Click To Tweet

With that, let’s look at one final area that significantly impacts personal brand. And in keeping with the other posts in this series, this isn’t just about the obvious stuff like workouts. So even if you hit the gym six days a week, keep reading. There’s something here for you.

[Read more…] about Maximizing Your Personal Brand Part 4: Health

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