Daniel Kosmala, Author at Adam Kirk Smith

Daniel Kosmala | September 20, 2014 | 4 Comments

Less is More – Daniel Kosmala

We are always trying to do too much.

In our marriages, in our friendships, in our communities, and in our jobs.

Our tendency is to naturally say, “Yes.”. We accept far more than we can handle.

Recently, I have been asking myself, “Why?”. Why is it our tendency to overbook ourselves? To schedule two important meetings at the same time? To accept a board position for two local nonprofits when we only have time for one? To join 2 small groups at church?

All of it is driven by our desire to be accepted. And to be accepted, we feel like we need to be good at something. So, in our hopes of being good at something we take on anything that people offer us, because if it’s being offered, there must be an underlying reason why.

The honest truth is that if you wake up in the morning, there will always be opportunities in front of you.

This doesn’t mean you have to say, “yes” to all of them. Less is more.

It means you get to decide which path you will head down. But here’s a secret – saying “yes” to everything is the equivalent of spinning in a circle. Your feet will always be moving, but you will never make any progress.

I, more than anyone, need to stop trying to be decent at everything and need to be really spectacular at one or two things. I have always been good at a lot of different things. Unfortunately, I have never really known what it is like to be phenomenal or great at something.

I recognize this is because I have spread my efforts too thin over too many different options. I recognize that I say “yes” to way too many things months ago, but it is just as big of a struggle today as it was then.

How do we learn to say “no”? How do we learn to temper the excitement that comes with new opportunities in order to see them more clearly? What does it take to distinguish great opportunities from the good ones?

I’m asking you honestly. I do not have a great system for deciphering these kinds of things and I need one. Too often I find myself enamored by the flashiness of a good opportunity, all while missing the great opportunity already sitting in my lap.

I’d love to hear your thoughts and opinions on this. I’m all for cutting back and being really great a few things, but as of right now I am not there.

As always, thanks for reading and I can’t wait to hear your thoughts!

Daniel Kosmala | September 13, 2014 | 1 Comment

In Business Relationships, People are Friends, Not Food – Daniel Kosmala

I love the resurgence I am seeing in the business world towards the idea of placing a high value not only on people, but relationships. They always matter, and that includes business relationships. It is so easy to get caught up the processes of the world, and to focus on the what instead of the who.

Previously, I believe the world revolved around a results driven outcome. What are the numbers? Where’s our progress? How are we doing? Numbers are great and have their place in any business, but they should never be the end-all be-all.

Business should never be about B2B or B2C. It should be P2P, or person to person.

Don’t treat consumers like they are a number or a dollar sign. Find a higher, more dignified purpose.

I can’t help but think of the animated movie, Finding Nemo, in this situation. During the journey, the main characters Dory and Marlin encounter a group of sharks who meet regularly almost like an alcoholics anonymous group, but their slogan is better: “Fish are friends, not food.”

Sharks, whose primary sustenance comes from eating fish, are trying to reform themselves and make friends with those they used to terrorize. Sure it’s a hyperbolic example, but I think you can see my parallel. Consumers should be our friends, not a means to an end. People are the ultimate end.

So why not treat them that way? Why not treat every customer like they matter?

Going a step further, let’s not just customers that way, let’s create processes that stand alone and reflect the attitude of the people running the company. Let’s take AT&T for example. I have my cable and internet via AT&T UVerse. I was beyond pleased with my service over the course of the first year…we had great rates, great service and great customer service. But recently my one year contract with them expired and because I had ‘first-year discounts’ my bill spiked $60 per month as soon as those discounts expired.

I dealt with the customer service and they were fairly accommodating and helped me lower my bill, but my monthly payment has still increased about $25/month. And I’m supposed to be pleased with that, because it’s the norm in the cable/internet industry.

But, in what world should we ever be okay with a significant price increase for the same products and services for being a loyal customer. And not only a loyal customer, but someone who has referred friends to said service because the first year was such a great experience…

It makes no sense. The customer service is great and I’m always treated well, but the processes don’t match up. Had they started me off at the rate I’m paying now and just never increased it, I would’ve been fine. But, because I got a cheaper rate and it goes up for being a loyal customer I am left with a bad taste in my mouth. I don’t have many other options and the cable companies know this, so they exploit it. They can say they love their customers and try and schmooze us, but when it comes down to it, their processes tell a completely different story.

Are you telling one story in your personal interactions and another with your processes and the way you do business?

Believe me, even if you ignore it, people will take notice. And they will always remember.

So, why not just be aligned all the way through? Be transparent and consistent. Your customers will reward you for it and so will your friends. Be who you say you are going to be. People will take notice.

Have you experienced what I’m talking about? Had a poor experience with a person or company saying one thing and doing another? Have you had an incredible experience where everything lined up? Tell me about it in the comments.

Daniel Kosmala | September 6, 2014 | Leave a Comment

Emotions Gone Wild – Daniel Kosmala

I’m going to start with a bold premise:

All decisions are made at an emotional level.

The first time my boss ever said this to me, I gave him a funny look. No way do I make decisions at an emotional level. I’m even-keel and logical when I make decisions. I mentally calculate the risk as I weigh the pros and cons before I ever commit to a decision. How is that at all emotional?

The simple answer?

You cannot separate yourself from your emotions. They are always a part of you. No matter what. You were created with them and you will die with them.

The good news is that in most cases our emotions help serve us as a kind of compass.

Unfortunately, not everyone knows how to properly use a compass. Even those that do may end up lost in a forest somewhere because they miscalculated their destination or made one tiny mistake in their navigation. But by learning how to use a compass and navigate with one successfully you have a skill that will serve you for life.

Your emotions are no different.

They have to be honed, carefully managed, and most important they need to be understood by the user.

Most of us are only really familiar with strong, basic emotions: Anger, Joy, Sadness, and Contentedness

Well most of us are aware that compasses for 4 main points: North, South, East, and West.

And while sometimes you will need to go exactly North, more often than not your compass needle will be between any two of those four points. And so it is with your emotions. But it is up to you learn what that ‘in-between’ emotions feel like and what they mean to you.

By acknowledging that all decisions are made at an emotional level you are not expressing weakness. You are admitting the truth that we cannot be separated from our emotions no matter how hard we try. And the beauty is you can now embrace the truth and leverage it to your advantage. Our emotions are here to help us and guide us. Why not make the most of it?

It is tough to identify emotions beyond the basics, but one of the ways my boss has challenged me is to use ‘feeling words’. One to three words that actually convey a feeling or sense of emotion. Words like “good, fine, great, happy, sad, and decent” do not cut it. Recently my boss asked me what I was feeling after a slew of back to back meetings and all I could come up with was “full” and “introspective” but those two words were enough to convey to him where I was in a simple, straightforward way.

This exercise does not come easy for me. It’s uncomfortable and a definite struggle to use a few simply complex words to describe what I’m truly feeling, but it’s pushing me to better understand myself and help me moving forward.

If I’m going to make decisions where my emotions play a role, why not understand everything at play and be in control?

Let me know your thoughts in the comments!