[dropshadowbox align=”none” effect=”raised” width=”565px” height=”” background_color=”#c5c5c5″ border_width=”1″ border_color=”#dddddd” ]A big part of what we talk about here on asmithblog.com is relationships, and what relationship is more important than with your spouse? At some point along the way through that specific relationship or another, we have been faced with thinking that avoidance is the easiest way out. Well, we are fortunate enough to have Justin and Trisha Davis here today to share some of their thoughts on what avoidance actually does and challenges us to take a deep look at ourselves.[/dropshadowbox]
Avoidance is like a drug. It convinces you that a little bit won’t hurt you, and by trying it you will feel better. But avoidance is addictive and it’s seductive. It makes you feel like the issues and the problems and the sins that you have aren’t as bad or as toxic or as lethal as they really are.
Avoidance is my drug of choice. It is my coping mechanism. Avoidance allows me to believe that if I ignore a problem long enough, if I pretend a sin doesn’t exist long enough, if I disregard my dysfunction long enough it will magically fix itself, or at minimum just go away. Avoidance convinces me that it can buy me more time and allow me to manage my image as I casually pursue repentance. Avoidance helps me be more sorry for the consequences of my actions than my actions themselves.
When you embrace avoidance too long, something dangerous happens. The distinct, clear voice of God that you once heard begins to soften. The promptings from the Holy Spirit that guide you and convict you and give you wisdom and discernment aren’t as frequent. At some point, they disappear all together. Funny thing about avoidance…eventually the jig is up, and you’re face to face with consequences:
Avoiding admitting my marital problems left me separated from my wife and kids
Avoiding honoring God with my finances left me in a pile of debt
Avoiding paying the price to be a good friend left me with fractured relationships
Avoiding confessing sin patterns left me with a mountain of regrets
Here’s what I’ve come to realize about living in avoidance…God never shows up when we pretend we have it more together than we really do. God rarely moves when we ignore His promptings. God seldom blesses our decision to avoid reality and just hope it goes away.
God’s power and his presence are unleashed most when we face the very things we are trying to avoid. God’s forgiveness and grace are experienced at their deepest levels when we stop pretending like we aren’t struggling or sinning or broken, but we confess our brokenness to a God that longs to heal us.
[dropshadowbox align=”none” effect=”raised” width=”565px” height=”” background_color=”#c5c5c5″ border_width=”1″ border_color=”#dddddd” ]This post on avoidance shows us just a glimpse into things they both learned through their journey. Their story of redemption and triumph is not only a fantastic read, it is inspiring for everyone, no matter where you are at in life.[/dropshadowbox]
CONTEST WINNERS HAVE BEEN ANNOUNCED IN COMMENT SECTION
And today you have a chance of winning one of three free copies through twitter, facebook or here on the blog. Here’s how:
1) Share this on twitter: “Read #beyondordinary by @justindavis33 & @trishadavis23 & make your marriage stronger. Win a copy here: http://asblog.co/Sh50zL”
2) Share this on Facebook: “Read Beyond Ordinary and make your marriage stronger. Win a copy here: http://asblog.co/Sh50zL ”
3) Leave a comment here, telling us why you want this book. (Or if you don’t know why, that’s ok too.)
The more you share it, the more times you are entered to win. Easy enough, right?
This giveaway ends on Friday, January 11th at 8pm eastern time. The randomly chosen winners will be announced at 8:30pm on that same night.
To read more of their story, pick up #beyondordinary at any of these online retailers:
Justin and Trisha Davis know all too well the dangers of settling for an ordinary marriage. Their own failure to recognize the warning signs almost resulted in the end of their marriage, their family, and their ministry. Justin and Trisha are bloggers, authors, speakers and founders of RefineUs Ministries. Sharing their story of pain, loss and redemption, RefineUs is igniting a movement to build healthy marriages and families. They are the co-authors of their first book, Beyond Ordinary: When a Good Marriage Just Isn’t Good Enough, published by Tyndale House Publishers. The Davises are bloggers and teachers who make their home in Nashville, TN with their three boys. You can follow their story on Facebook and you can also find both Justin and Trisha on twitter.